Unconscious Bias

Once again, check out how your life is 'arranged', right now, and try to discover the amount of freedom you truly have in leading it. You may still believe that you are absolutely free in "all" your beliefs, opinions, decisions, choices. But...are you really? Look into the feedback you received and you are still receiving, every single day. Your parents (teachers, church leaders etc.) instilled in your mind some basic principles that you have (probably unconsciously) followed till now. Were they more positive or negative? In any case, you can't get rid of them, unless a real rebellion happened in your spirit. Now friends, relatives, coworkers, preachers, the media assertively share opinions that are often capable of convincing you. In the end, you absorb what others said and make it your own. On the other hand, you could also just listen to all those 'voices', examine their message in depth, and follow your intuition. It unfailingly suggests what is "right" for you - throughout all the stages of your life. 

Like Reeds

"Man is like a reed, the weakest thing in nature, but he is a thinking reed" is a profound statement by 17th century French mathematician and philosopher Blaise Pascal. Human beings are indeed similar to reeds because they are not strong to all effects. This is due to their conditionings, complexes, naivety, jealousy, greed, and all the other forms of weakness that make them easy preys of unhappiness. The interesting side of Pascal's words is that, in spite of such frailty, human beings, differently from grass, are endowed with a mind. They can think. While a stalk cannot decide on how to react to blowing winds, a person can choose their behavior when faced by challenging situations. If they don't, it means that they see themselves as victims, and refuse to try to find a solution. Therefore, giving in to difficulties can only signify giving up the innate capability to "think" that belongs to each of us.

Seeing Yourself

A well-known saying states that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. It is true, but this is not all. Imagine this scenario: someone pays you a compliment, but you don't believe you deserve it. Would their words change the way "you" see yourself? Most probably not. You will still be discontented with the way you are. Second scenario: you behave in a negative way as a reaction to your conviction that people don't like you. Could the way they treat you become more positive? Definitely not. So, you will keep seeing yourself as unjustly treated. The point here is that, if you don't like and appreciate yourself, neither will the others or, even if they do, it won't change your inner feelings. On the other hand, if you choose to nurse self-confidence and show it to the world, you will be able to joyfully accept any compliment you are given, and your new attitude will be reflected in the way the world responds to you. Who wouldn't like that?        

'Better'

One word widely used is "better". What does it really mean? The usual definition implies 'superior quality'. But the actual meaning can greatly vary according to different interpretations. For someone a 'better life' might mean more money, for someone else it is a more fulfilling family situation, career or social environment. One wishes for the freedom to travel around the world, for another it's a quiet life in a comfortable home. For you it might indicate your wish for an increase in personal awareness or spiritual uplift. Once again, you realize that not only people and situations but also the words you use can make a huge difference. The fact that sometimes you feel misunderstood is a clear indication of how diverse the interpretation of words can be, even in a simple conversation. Verbal communication (both in oral and written forms) is something to be very careful about. Consequently, before 'judging' someone else, try to understand what their words really mean.

Evolving Stages

Each stage in life can be perceived as perfect, complete in itself. Yet, it naturally flows into the next one, and the next, and the next. When a toddler has learned the skills proper to his (her) age, he stops being a toddler and moves into the following stage, where more, new, higher skills are absorbed. Thus does every human being grow and experience different levels of "humanity". You may wonder what stage life will evolve into when the final level is completed. The theory of evolution is usually applied to living organisms in general. Could it be also referred to the emotional and/or spiritual reality of an individual? All you know for sure is that the atoms that form a physical body are transformed into a different state of existence. They don't disappear, they are never destroyed. What happens to the incorporeal "essence" that makes you who you are?

Justification vs. Explanation

A friend made a comment about an attitude of yours. In a way, they suggest that you need to make a change. What is your reaction? In one case, you just listen to their words without really taking them into consideration because you believe that each of you has the right to your opinion. However, you may feel hurt because you perceive those words as a criticism. Thus you react in a defensive way. In this case, your reaction may be caused by two different motivations: 1.the need to justify your attitude 2.a desire to explain the reasons for your behavior. To a superficial observer both 1 & 2 seem to be the same. But they are not. Justification implies recognition of having made a mistake, and unconsciously attempt to be 'forgiven' (as a child: not 'punished'). Explanation implies your right to make your reasons clear, with no acknowledgment of mistake. Sadly, people are often too quick to judge someone else's behavior, without first trying to understand what its real cause might be.

Snails Have Time

An old folk tale goes like this: Once all the animals had a meeting to complain about mankind, saying that human beings kept stealing what belonged to them. The hen mentioned its eggs, the cow its milk, the sheep  its wool etc. Only the snail said: I have something that people cannot steal from me: "Time"! Today, such statement sounds truer than ever. If you think about it, you realize that (almost) everybody living in the modern world seems to never have enough time to do whatever they decided they have to do. Every action is planned, every moment for doing stuff is written down: meetings, business trips, phone calls, videochat, sending emails, booking restaurants, catching the train, taking the children to school, to sport activities, to music lessons etc...Time for traditional, spontaneous visits with friends seems to have become a rather complicated affair to be arranged well in advance. Very little time for leisure, just running here and there, always busy being...busy! Lucky snail, it still hasn't changed its way of living.