Choose Your "Food"

You may have grown up believing that you are not good or smart enough, that you will never become a success, that you are an ugly duckling, that you must always please others in order to be accepted. Do any of these beliefs ring a bell? Does at least one make you aware of a conviction hidden in the depths of your spirit that you had never been aware of? Most negative beliefs, in fact, are not clearly detectable because the mind - the “ego” - tries to shelter you from them. The mind tells you that it's OK to stay as you are, that you cannot change, that it's not even worth trying to change. “What for?”, the little voice tells you. It's like fast food. Everybody knows that it's unhealthy but those who love it will keep on eating it... no matter what.

Your Principles

People often speak of principles. It seems that there are a lot of them, and they may be quite different for different kinds of people. Such principles might also change according to times, environments and circumstances. By the way, what is the exact definition of "principle"? According to the dictionary, it is "a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of belief or behavior or for a chain of reasoning". History has shown that beliefs and reasoning have undergone great changes throughout the centuries (nowadays a much shorter time seems to be required!). Therefore you should not be surprised if you see that something that was "the truth" yesterday is completely ignored, overlooked and even rejected today. Are there any principles that should be unchangeable? There certainly are. One could be the belief in the need for you to be the best you can be, here and now. What else?

What a Task!

Have you ever wondered why you feel instinctively attracted towards certain people, indifferent towards others, and completely turned off by some? It seems there is an internal switch that, on an unconscious level, dictates the sensations that both your body and mind experience in front of human beings, things and situations. There must be a mysterious mechanism that - deep inside your "self" - examines, dissects, analyzes a huge amount of factors - detectable and undetectable - in order to yield an almost immediate result, i.e. your response to the outside stimulus. You are a fantastic "machine" indeed, perfectly assembled with innumerable parts, each presiding a very specific "function", each working on a different level of consciousness. You may be somewhat unaware of most of these "parts". Nevertheless, it's wonderful to at least realize that you are the one who is responsible/in charge of their functioning. 

Minds

I love this quote from Eleanor Roosevelt:

Great minds discuss ideas.
Average minds discuss events.
Small minds discuss people.

In which category would you put yourself?

Your Next Chapter

Imagine your life as a book. Every day you write one page. Page after page, you complete one chapter. It is one part of your personal experience. You keep writing and all goes well until you stop and start re-reading what you previously wrote. At this point you are stuck. You want to start a new chapter, but you can't stop re-reading the previous ones. Silly, you might say. And you would be right. But... don't you do the same when you plan to change something in your life while continuing to behave exactly as you have always done? Your behavior and your attitude are the main factors in creating a more serene, fulfilling life. If you wish to improve the quality of your experiences, a transformation "in yourself" is required. All you need is to discard something old, non-beneficial, even harmful, in order to make room for something new, something more valuable and rewarding.

Reflections On a Movie

After re-watching an old movie, I was coaxed to reflect upon some famous words the main character utters at the very end. First she says, "I'll think about it tomorrow". How often human beings - maybe you, too - say the same thing when they want to avoid to face a problem! They convince themselves that, after all, it's not so important or urgent and feel justified in ignoring it, probably hoping that non acknowledging it might make it miraculously disappear. But it won't. On the other hand, her final words - "After all... tomorrow is another day" - seem to imply that there is still (or, maybe, there is "always") a way to make things better, that another chance might be waiting around he corner.  It seems that she missed it. But you.... don't.

Doors

Facing a so-called failure, you are usually given advice such as, "Don't give up; try, try again". And it is true. You must not feel defeated when you don't succeed. But sometimes you need to face reality: you must carefully check your qualities, your strong points, your skills. You may realize that the goal you are pursuing may not be the right one "for you". Picture yourself in front of an imaginary door. You try to open it in any possible way, but the door remains shut. You may even think of braking it down. But that wouldn't work. By force, no positive results can be achieved. So, what to do? Accept the fact that such door might not be "your" door. If you look carefully, you will realize that many doors surround you. You just need to find the one whose lock fits your key (or viceversa).

Time and Gardens

Can you see your soul, your life, yourself as a garden? If you can, you can also easily understand how extremely significant every moment that goes by is - with the consequences it entails - because it is like a seed planted in fertile soil. At first it seems that nothing happens. But then (and it may take quite some time) something starts to show. The little green stalk out of the ground is like the hint of awareness that you begin to feel in the deep of your spirit. It's the awareness of the significance of your being part of humanity, of the relevance of your attitude, of the consequentiality of your behavior. Time is the great Teacher, but only if you are willing to receive the message it keeps sending you throughout your whole life by means of the experiences if offers you, day after day, after day, after day.

Up and Down

You would like to be happy all the time, wouldn't you? It's  a human, normal, general wish that all mankind shares. Is it possible, though? Hardly. Is it a tragedy? Not really. Why? Simply because being "human" means experiencing all the ranges of feelings, moods, sentiments, according to the experiences we have all given throughout our lives. Besides, you can only enjoy happiness, or any other feeling, only if you have knowledge of its opposite. If you lived on the top of a mountain, would you want to stay there forever? You probably wouldn't. Also the lower, even the lowest lands have their positive side: you might stumble on some rocks, your shoes may be covered in mud, but the "walk" will continue as far as you like. The exhilaration of being at the top will also reduce your freedom of movement. Therefore, up you go... stay and enjoy the view.... down you go... move and enjoy the walk.

Are You A Reformer?

How do you feel about "reforming the world"? You may believe you have the answers to the problems of your Country or even of the whole planet. More modestly, you agree that such task would be too daunting, so you limit yourself to thinking that you could change just a few human beings. Even just one. But... could you - can you really? Is it even possible? If you examine the situation, if you acknowledge the reality of life, you soon realize that the desire to change another is just this: a "desire", a wish that will most probably remain unfulfilled. Why? Because you cannot change anyone except yourself. This is not only true, but also fair. In fact, what right to you have to transform someone in someone else? Be sincere: you want this change because it would suit "you" better. 

Knowing...Truly

I like this sentence I read in Parker Palmer's book 'On the Brink of Everything': "One advantage of age is the chance it gives us to learn and relearn until we truly know". These words tell a profound verity: when we hear, understand and accept a certain principle or belief, we are convinced that we have learned it. We presume we "know". But that happens rarely. You might agree with an ethical rule but then, when a situation challenges you, you may tend to momentarily forget what you had previously accepted and allow yourself to make a little exception. And another.... But, in the course of your life, you are given the chance to experience, over and over, how a little exception here and another little exception there create a pattern of behavior that you did not want in the first place. Only then do you truly learn (= make it part of yourself). At this point.... you "know"!

Give Caesar....

Wondering about the well known words, "Give Caesar what belongs to Caesar", a very simple explanation related only to our every-day life came to my mind. Think about it: who might this "Caesar" be? Who or what does he represent? How do you relate to him/her/it? And what should you give 'him' that belongs to 'him'? Caesar may symbolize another human being, any human being - a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, a co-worker, the bus driver, a homeless... just anyone. It could even be your pet, or any animal, the plants in your garden or any plant... Maybe... what belongs to any living creature or thing is just respect, acknowledgment, appreciation. You may just need to recognize them, fulfill whatever duty you have towards any of them, not deprive them of their rights. That should be enough.

The Art of Living

The Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius wrote, “The art of living is more similar to a fight than to a dance”. Is it really so? It seems it is, according to what we see around us and even inside of us. But… what does “the art of living” mean? It means “to live well”. To live well does not mean to live your life without problems, in a kind of ever-lasting limbo. This would be a rather empty and dull life, wouldn’t it? What makes your life worth living is the fact that it is always new. This implies a continuous confrontation with yourself and with others. It is creativity and awareness.

Free Expression

A word we make a large use of is "freedom", which is defined as "the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint". That sounds wonderful, doesn't it? Imagine: being able to "act" any way you want, i.e. do everything you wish to do; "say" whatever you want, express any thought your mind creates. No restraints whatsoever to your ability to be whomever you want to be. But... wait a minute. What about your fellow human beings? Do they have the same right of expression? If they do, don't you think that clashes will naturally happen when you interact too "freely" with them? It's very possible, actually probable that some of your actions will be in contrast with theirs, some of your opinions, beliefs and convictions will not agree with theirs. So, what to do? As usual, the middle road is the best road: feel free to express yourself, but also care about other people's feelings and opinions. Your right to express yourself doesn't grant you the authority or license to offend or hurt another. Besides, extremes are never positive or beneficial - to anyone. 

Time Runs Faster

Today: beginning of the second part of the year! It seems yesterday that the first part started and now the end is already approaching. Everything, and I mean "everything", not only seems to be be moving faster: it really does! No more slow planning, talking, conversing, writing, eating etc. Each human action reflects the need to go fast, faster and faster. There is no time to linger, to wait, to look around, possibly to fully enjoy anything. Human beings feel this incontrollable necessity to run after a future they naively believe will bring more happiness. But the future is unreachable. Every tomorrow can be only experienced by a new 'today' which, in turn, is followed by another tomorrow. So? Unfortunately (or, rather, naturally) also Time complies with this unavoidable trend and it also runs, runs, runs, faster and faster.... Till when? Till where?