Useless Talk

Sometimes people speak just for the sake of speaking. They believe they can say anything, without really thinking about what they are saying. This doesn't mean that they are speaking nonsense. They just don't pay attention to their words, that can sometimes be useless or inappropriate. You may have experienced the impulse of expressing a thought, talking about a personal situation, sharing an experience about something you have heard or seen, only to later realize that you could have easily avoided the sharing because it was out of place, or void of interest for the other party. This kind of regret is a common sensation. 'Why did I say that?', you ask yourself. And you wish you hadn't. Nothing too serious, though, just a nagging feeling of uselessness....A bit difficult to describe but, if you have experienced it, you "know".  

Always Truthful?

Imagine this situation. One of your friends is recovering from a health problem. You have just read an article (or watched a video, or found a website) that is related to your friend's issue. You believe that sharing such information might be useful. But, when you enthusiastically mention it, your friend states that they are not interested. How does such answer make you feel? They were sincere - all right. Now switch roles: you are the convalescent and your friend suggests an article (a video or a website) they think might benefit your health, but you are not interested. How do you answer? Is a truthful answer "always" the best? Even if you are hurting someone who meant well, a friend who was only trying to help?  Or would you rather simply thank them (although you won't follow their suggestion?)

'Sprout' or Quit?

During one of your walks, you may have noticed a heap of rocks. See them now with your imagination. Look closely: first you only detect the rocks tightly stuck together. Then, when you pay real attention, you realize that a tiny green plant is growing amidst them. In spite of the unwelcoming environment, it is unexpectedly emerging from underground to the surface. Yes, the tiny plant is "boldly going" where you wouldn't expect it. Like the iconic Star Trek spaceship "Enterprise"? In a way, yes! The small seed certainly did not find itself in the best conditions to sprout and grow - buried as it was under  heavy rocks. Yet...it did it. Examine now yourself in front of a life challenge, and check your attitude. Do you see yourself as a little, daring 'Enterprise'-plant, or rather as a...quitter?   

Two Sister Words

Let's say that you are ok with your life, but not completely satisfied. There are things that are going well, others that aren't. When you think of what is not going well, two words may come to your mind: disillusionment and disappointment. They might seems almost synonyms because they both convey a feeling of regret from your failed expectations, but they are not exactly the same. You experience disappointment when things 'come out' differently from what you had expected. Disillusionment is the feeling you experience when you realize that things 'are' different from what you had expected. In the first case the feeling is referred to not achieving the results you expected from your action, when your plans fail.  On the other hand, you are disillusioned when you realize that your life (or a relationship...) is not the one you had expected or hoped for. The first may encourage you not to give up, to try again or try something else. The second implies a feeling of sadness and may lead you to hopeless resignation.

Misinterpretation

Communication is a wonderful way to put two human beings in direct contact. There are many ways to communicate, each according to personal goals, habits, skills. While there are different ways to express one's feelings, the most common is, of course, the spoken word. But not always is it easy to convey one's own message in a way that the other person understands. They can hear your words, but they may not get the gist of what you mean. You say something that is supposed to be funny or lovingly ironical, and your interlocutor gets offended. You believe you are describing something fairly well, only to see that they didn't get the right picture. But the saddest realization is that the person you are attempting to communicate with does not perceive your idea or feeling. Yes, the wrong interpretation of words can cause quite a bit of damage in human relationships. 

Why Life?

A short reflection & relevant questions. (Quotes from a movie)

"I allowed myself to lead this little life, when inside me there was so much more. It's all gone unused and now it never will be." 

"Why do we get all this life if we do nothing with it?"                   

"Why do we get all these feelings and dreams and hopes, if we don't ever use them?"

                    **********************  

Beware of the 'Storm'

If you enjoy gardening, you are careful to spot anything dangerous to your rose buds. As sunshine is provided, you keep checking that your flowers receive enough water; you provide the nutrients that are needed and take care of the weeds and insects that might jeopardize your plants' health. While gardening, though, you may become too busy looking for bugs, and miss noticing the big storm that is approaching. Might this be also the case of your 'position' in your personal relationship with your partner, family, friends, colleagues? Sometimes people are ready to pay attention to annoying little "bugs" such as someone else's facial expressions, unpleasant words or tiny negligences, and miss the real cause of such nuisances. If this happens to you, too, do you care enough to also check your own behavior? You might spot, recognize and hopefully be able to avoid a big "storm" that may break into your own life.  

Each Instant Counts

An expression that is often mentioned in our modern era is "time management". Most people refer it to work matters only but, actually, its meaning involves all aspects of your life. Every instant that is lived is important because it might offer you an opportunity that won't materialize again: an opportunity not only for material success but also, and mainly, for your personal development. If you are willing to try, it's not hard to arrange your 'schedule' in a way that allows you to take care of your needs, both material and emotional/spiritual. Some people seem unable to manage their time well, so they feel they are always in a rush, they feel they don't have enough time. But you will never have enough time unless you look for it, and "find" it. Your time is one of the few things you have control upon. So, make good use of it, if you care.  For your own good make every day, every moment count.   

Number 1

Think about the infinitely small (the quantum field) and the infinitely big (the cosmos) and then you, in between these two worlds. You may see yourself on a different plane, unaffected by the other two. But you are. Those worlds actually merge in your mind. Look inside yourself: on one side you perceive your feelings and sensations (intimate world), on the other you detect your imagination and rational thoughts (expanding world). They seem clearly separated but it's just an impression, an 'illusion'. Apparently they are on different levels, but these levels in reality blend into what makes you - "you". Your "self" contains the infinitely small and the infinitely big, as you contain all the differences that can be experienced by every human being. This consideration may give you a hint of the unity of all that exists. Numbers seem all separated and different, yet none can exist without the one that comes before it as well as the one that comes after it. And no number would be real at all without the unifying #1. 

Who Stays?

Are you attached to people or things? How attached are you? Are you "extremely" attached? Attachment in the sense of 'affection' is good. When it entails dependence, it's not. When it is 'extreme', it means that you couldn't feel happy (in some case even survive) without them. This is very dangerous. People in your life are for you to love them and be loved by them, but never losing your 'emotional independence'. Objects are there just for you to use. So, as nothing is permanent, it is illogical to allow yourself to look for permanence in anyone or anything. Change happens, people are here now, later they may go away. Objects may disappear in a way or another. What never leaves is your own "self". This, is here to stay - forever! 

Attention

Seeking attention versus giving attention: isn't this an interesting topic, especially nowadays? Also in the past people wished to be known and appreciated, and they aimed at achieving such goal through personal skills and effort. In modern times, though, technology offers numberless ways to seek and find attention easily. The number of "followers" has become an extremely important point of interest for many because - they believe - it indicates how popular they are. Being popular shows that they are valued, admired, even idolized. As a consequence, no means is deemed unsuitable, if one's main goal is to get as much attention as possible. On the other hand, this extreme need to be noticed can make anyone careless towards others. The two situations are irreconcilable. Why? Because seeking constant attention is a sign of self-centeredness, while giving it indicates care and consideration for one's fellow human beings.  

No 'Fixed" Way

A certain philosophy of life tells you that, given a certain stimulus, you react in a sort of 'fixed' way. If someone says something unpleasant to you, you spontaneously react by feeling hurt. This is what people usually do because it is natural. But, actually, it is not true. It is not natural. It is a 'choice'. In fact, if you decide to change your reaction, you can do it by reflecting on the situation. You will reason that the previously-perceived-offender might have had their reasons to behave the way they did. And if you accept the fact that everybody has the right to their own reasons, also their behavior must be accepted. Nevertheless, you are also free to disagree and avoid any future relationship with them. In conclusion, you are not a narrow-minded being. You are an individual who is free to think, reason, choose and make decisions about your own thoughts, beliefs, choices and actions.     

A Bi-dimensional World

Your senses allow you to perceive length, width, and hight. From a merely physical point of view, there are no doubts about this truth. What about another side of the human existence? If you think about it in depth, you may realize that the perception of a wider reality - a reality that includes 'everything' - actually eludes the human senses. This world may be seen as just two-dimensional, a space where you are aware of your personal place, and possibly the place of the other beings, but you lack the vision of the whole. Your perception moves only in length and width: you see the specific 'location' of each piece of the puzzle (yours and another's) but you are not in a position from which you can visualize the whole puzzle. For this reason, you often wonder about the meaning of it all. So many 'whys' crowd your mind, but you can't find an answer. Or, maybe, you can. In fact, it's possible. It depends on you to create a sort of ethereal wings that can take you up, above the physical reality.

No Fixing The Storm

A ship kept in a bottle is perfect. All the details are carefully taken care of, each piece is exactly in the right spot. How wonderful it would be if your life could be 'built' and kept in the same way. You tend to believe that it can. You often think that, if you do everything the way it should be done, all things simply have to go well. Unfortunately, life is not made like a ship in a bottle. Instead, it resembles a ship in the ocean, where changes in weather can be expected any time. A ship navigating unknown waters (even 'known', at times) is never sure of what the next challenge is. When the storm comes, the wise ship - or, rather, the wise captain - does not try to fix it. He knows it can't be done. He accepts it, and does his best. But, in the end, the ship must surrender to a force beyond its power. It realizes it is not 'always' in control because an unexpected storm may suddenly materialize, with no warning. Your life (and everybody else's) is the same. Good happenings and bad happenings are bound to occur. It's up to you to choose how to react to both.

A Spider's Thread

Have you ever noticed a spider's thread? No, not a web: a 'thread'. A spiderweb is not an unusual sight, while a thread is more difficult to detect. If you have the opportunity to observe such architectural marvel, you can't help wondering how it was done. The thinnest, almost invisible silky thread spreads from the brach of a tree to the branch of another tree, or from the back of a chair in your garden to the railing of the upstairs deck of your house. How could a tiny spider spin one thread from one place and be able to anchor it to a far away spot? Most of us don't have an answer (probably only entomologists do!). But the interesting reflection that can be made here is that, if a minuscule insect is able to carry out such a difficult (seemingly impossible) task, how come that you - like most human beings - are discouraged in front of obstacles? And sometimes these obstacles are not even so difficult to overcome. The fact is that human beings think too much - and "worry" - before dealing with a challenge, while other creatures...just do it!