One Path To Happiness

“By the way, what is happiness?”, asks Charlie Brown, the funny, yet philosophical cartoon character. Yes, indeed. What is it? Have you ever wondered and tried to find a suitable answer? You might have come up with a definition of “pleasure”, of “satisfaction”, but these are only temporary feelings. “Happiness” is something else, if it really exists. We wont’ try to define it here, either. But we can start by examining one feeling that certainly deprives human beings of the serenity they need to move towards happiness. Such feeling is called “the need to judge”. Have you ever endeavored to look at reality with “neutral eyes”, i.e. without judging anybody and anything, accepting what you see, what is happening, the way people are –  without wishing to change them? If you try and shake all judgment off, you will feel lighter, as if a heavy burden has fallen off your shoulders. You will experience PEACE. Judging (and often “condemning”) is an awfully hard job to do. You seem to believe that it’s the only way to live your life but, in so doing, you miss seeing one of the paths that can lead you towards the main street called “Happiness”.

Less Separation

Has it ever happened to you to look at people not as passing shadows, but as “real” individuals – the same as you? Although you have never met them, you don’t know their stories, sometime (quite seldom, though!) you feel a sort of connection, an awareness of them being just like you, human beings who are experiencing life, each with their challenges, just as you are. Can this awareness help create a greater understanding, a deeper feeling of “oneness”? Let us hope so. You can’t honestly say that you already feel this kind of oneness with your fellow humans, but trying to see them in a new light, under a different perspective might be a first step. What is the “new light”? You could start by considering them not as clearly separated from you as you usually do. “They” and “I”, with a straight division line in between.The world needs to feel more united, people need to experience fewer selfish feelings of “mine” and more feelings of “ours”. More empathy toward each other should be the next step in everybody’s life.

The Right Answer

Many questions about geography, history, science etc.. can be easily answered by simply going on the Internet.  Even if you ask about who you are and what the purpose of your life is, about how far you should go in trying to make your marriage work or about how you should raise your child or behave toward others, you will find someone ready to give you “the” answer. The problem is that for such topics not “one” answer is suitable for everyone. You feel that the books you read and the inspirational talks you listen to are not providing you with the solution you need. Why? Simply because what others say or write is the answer they found for themselves, according to “who they are”. Are their explanations able to convince you and practically help you? They may or they may not. They can certainly assist you in formulating the problem, they can provide you with theories, but they are unable to give you "your own" answer, the one suitable for you. A teacher can show you the direction, but the actual path towards self-improvement must be found by you, with your own means. No one else can do it for you. The discovery of something “original” is the result of original, personal thought.

Imagine!

Einstein said that imagination is more important than knowledge. What you “know” for sure is certainly significant, but what your mind can conceive is even more meaningful. Reality “is”. Imagination makes you see what “can be”. If human beings had not used imagination, nothing would have ever changed. Mind - therefore thought - has the power to make you do anything you want. It can keep you down and it can raise you up. So, how come that you keep sitting on the first rung of the ladder of spiritual progress? Possibly you haven’t  even “seen” the ladder, the tool you need to rise, to change, to improve yourself and, consequently, your life. It is easier to remain stuck on the lower level, complaining about a situation you don’t like, an unhealthy relationship, an unfulfilling job, rather than do something about it. Are “you” doing something about what you don’t like in your life? Can you imagine, (= create with your mind) a way of solving whatever is bothering you? 

Lion In A Cage

Sometime you say that you don’t believe you are the way others seem to see you. But usually … “you are”! It's possible that others perceive traits of your character that you are unable of seeing. In reality, you are able of being what you want, although you are usually unaware of it. Think about when you  complain about this and that. Whenever you do it, you admit you are feeling powerless, you see yourself as a victim of the situation. You feel you cannot do anything about it. You feel imprisoned by circumstances, therefore you can’t be who you want to be. Consequently, you are like a lion in a cage. The good news is that, if you try to free yourself, you’ll realize that the cage is not real, it only exists in your imagination. If you endeavor to do a little more that you are used to doing, you’ll see that your potential is much greater than you think. Circumstances can be changed, problems can be solved. All you need in order to carry out this process is to become AWARE, i.e. to start seeing the world and yourself without the dark lenses of conditioning.

Communication Is The key

Have you noticed that people (and you, too) usually prefer to talk rather than listen? One time YOU talk and the others aren’t paying attention, and the next time THEY are talking and your mind is elsewhere. Should we therefore be surprised by the lack of true dialog, of compassion and understanding that seems to be so widely spread nowadays? Most  people appear to be contented (but are they really?) living in their cozy little “cell”, the tiny, self-centered space they have created, where they have no need for true communication. Other times, even if you are actually listening to what someone else is saying, you understand something totally different from what they meant. Their words have a definite meaning for them, which is not what “you” perceive. How is this possible? Words are words and they should have the same meaning for everybody. Yes, they should. But sometimes they don’t. Do you remember that time when you said (or he said), “You got it wrong!” or “It’s not what I meant!”. An improved way to communicate will greatly benefit the whole world. Shall WE start to establish a better “connection” with our interlocutors?

Helping Others Can Be Tricky

When you talk about something that you tried but did not succeed, you love to say, "I did my best" and with this you believe you are amply justified. Now, if you really think about it, you should wonder if doing your best is really enough. Sometimes it seems that, although you honestly believe that you have said and done the right think, maybe it is not totally so. As the result is quite different (sometimes even the opposite) of what you expected or hoped for, a doubt might arise about the rightfulness of your action. How come? Difficult to say. The real problem is that we are all different. My motivations and needs are not the same as yours, and yours are different from mine. They might even be in contrast. Therefore you tend to "honestly" believe that what is good for you should be good for everybody else. But this is not the case. So... be careful when trying to do good to your fellow humans. You might end up harming them rather than helping them.